


I Dream Of Utopia

by MiniSuga127



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: ATEEZ Storyline Event, Broken Friendships, But anyways plz give it a read, Dreams, Gen, I literally dk what else to tag, Memories, Utopia, super open ended
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:15:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 3,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25178275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniSuga127/pseuds/MiniSuga127
Summary: Eight boys united under one dream. The promise of utopia was the only thing that kept them going. That and the fact that they had each other.Everything changes when Hongjoong disappears.Is all hope lost?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	1. Mingi's Downfall

**Author's Note:**

> Heyooo this is my entry for the storyline event! It's not much but I'm surprisingly content with it. Hope you like it as much as I do!

_ Is it really surprising anymore? _

_ Shouldn't I be used to it by now? _

These were the thoughts continuously ringing in Mingi's head.

Staring at his broken reflection in the shattered mirror, he heaved a heavy sigh, before crossing the short distance of his room and flopping onto his bed.

He stared up at the water stained ceiling, relieved that it wouldn't rain soon so he'd have one less problem to deal with.

Shaking his head, he really thought he should be used to this by now.

His family's financial situation definitely wasn't a new thing after all.

They'd lived this way for as long as he could remember, so why was it different now?

Maybe it had something to do with how lonely he had become in the past few months.

Back when his friends were still around, things like a dripping ceiling and broken mirrors didn't matter as much.

His mind was preoccupied with thoughts of his friends and the adventures they'd embark on together.

His friends made it easier to forget everything wrong with his life.

Of course, it hadn't always been like that.

Sure, his friends made him smile and laugh, but the lingering sorrow in his heart never went away.

He thought a lot about why he felt the way he did and after some time he realized it wasn't because of the lack of money.

It was because he felt that he didn't deserve to have a dream.

All his friends had dreams and goals, and to be honest, so did he.

The only problem was, he knew he'd never be able to achieve his dreams, without feeling guilty for leaving his parents.

His parents of course, insisted that he should go on and do what he wanted, that they'd be ok without him.

They encouraged him to go live with his uncle who would be able to provide more for him, but Mingi refused.

He came clean about his feelings to Hongjoong one day, telling him that someone like him couldn't afford to have a dream.

Hongjoong had smiled and told him that someone like him was in fact the most justified in wanting to spread their wings and fly.

He told him he didn't have to leave his parents for long and that soon he would be able to pay them back for everything they did.

Still, Mingi decided to stay and Hongjoong respected his decision.

But Mingi realized he felt a lot better after that day.

He didn't feel like he didn't deserve to dream and soon Hongjoong began to tell him of his dream of utopia.

Mingi was convinced at the time, fully believing that the eight of them would one day be content, that they would eventually find their utopia.

These days it was different.

Ever since Hongjoong disappeared, Mingi reverted back to his old self.

Hongjoong had been wrong.

Sometimes, he would see the boy in his dreams, telling him all the things he used to.

“You can still dream, Mingi. It's not too late for you.”

Whenever he said that, Mingi would sigh and shake his head.

“Living without dreaming is a normal thing for a guy like me.” He would tell him. “Dreams are too lavish for the poor.”


	2. Jongho's Lost Friend

Jongho liked to believe he was responsible most of the time.

He was always on time to events, he was always organized and everyone he knew trusted him with all their hearts.

But there was one thing Jongho lacked and that was a sense of direction, both literally and figuratively.

He was always getting lost at amusement parks and museums.

Logically he always knew his friends couldn't be far, but everywhere he looked all he saw were unfamiliar faces.

He'd wander around for God knows how long only to run into Hongjoong at some point, the older boy immediately wrapping him up in a hug and comforting him.

“It's ok, Jongho.” He'd tell him. “It's ok to feel lost at times. I'll always find you, ok?”

And he did.

Hongjoong never let him down. 

Even in those times when Jongho knew exactly where he was and his friends surrounded him from all sides, he often still felt lost.

While all his friends had dreams and goals, Jongho honestly had no idea what direction to take in life.

In times like those, he'd often find himself aimlessly dribbling a ball in the basketball court near his house.

Something about keeping his eyes on the basket made him feel grounded, as if his life was leading him somewhere, as if he had a purpose.

He'd never tell Hongjoong where he was going but the older boy somehow always knew where to find him.

He'd stand and watch sometimes, cheering him on from the sidelines. Other times, he'd join in, laughing as he stole the ball.

After that, they'd sometimes walk home in silence.

Other times, Hongjoong would gently prompt him to tell him what was wrong.

One day, Jongho decided to tell Hongjoong how lost he felt all the time.

How he felt like his life was meaningless, while the others had dreams to chase.

Hongjoong had smiled and told him about his own dream.

A dream that the eight of them would one day find their peace.

Where they'd finally be able to find all their deepest desires.

A dream to find utopia.

After that day, Jongho no longer felt lost.

And he noticed neither did anyone else.

Every single one of their problems slowly began to vanish as they united under one dream.

Everyone believed in utopia.

Until slowly, things began to change.

Jongho wished he had noticed it sooner.

He wished he had realized that while he was no longer lost, Hongjoong was slowly but surely losing sight of his dream.

He wished he had known that his friend was losing hope.

Because with Hongjoong's loss of conviction and belief, everything began falling apart once more.

Things went downhill so fast, but Jongho held onto his dream no matter what.

Until one day, when Hongjoong vanished.

That's when Jongho went back to normal.

When he lost his way once more.

The feeling of uncertainty was back and hurt more than ever.

But what hurt Jongho most was that he could never return the favor to Hongjoong.

Hongjoong was lost but Jongho could do nothing for him.

He was too young to reach out to his lost friend.

As Jongho sat alone on the basketball court bench and stared out at the wide empty expanse, a single thought rang through his mind.

_ Where am I now, where should I go? _


	3. Yeosang's Light

Yeosang had no idea where he was going.

All he knew was that he didn't want to be here.

And by ‘here’ he meant this world.

This broken and corrupt world.

He knew it wasn't possible but sometimes he wished the utopia Hongjoong had always talked about actually existed.

He sighed, a twinge of sorrow stabbing his heart as he thought of his Hyung.

He would never forget the day his brother had randomly disappeared.

While everyone else had been worried out of their minds at his disappearance, Yeosang was just sad.

But something told him he would be back. It had been a long time, but Yeosang didn't doubt that he'd be seeing the man soon.

He lost hope sometimes, remembering how everything had been different with Hongjoong around.

How the dark world seemed to work up the courage to glow just the slightest bit.

As if inspired by Hongjoong's own bright aura.

Yeosang was also often inspired by him.

It was because of him he was able to achieve so much in his life.

Hongjoong was a fighter and that inspired him to become one.

That's why Yeosang didn't believe it when people told him Hongjoong was gone for good.

It wasn't true.

He wouldn't believe it for a second.

Yeosang stopped walking for a second, tilting his head back and squinting up at the countless stars twinkling in the night sky.

He sighed, noticing how even the stars seemed to be shining half-heartedly in Hongjoong's absence.

“Look up at the stars in the night sky.” Hongjoong had once said to him.

But the stars didn't shine in the night sky he was looking at, so Yeosang continued to walk looking down on the ground.

  
  



	4. Wooyoung's Calling

The minute Wooyoung started to read comic books, he knew what his calling was.

There was something awe inspiring about the creative storytelling that immediately grabbed his attention.

He knew he wanted to become a comic book illustrator.

It had been his dream for as long as he could remember.

And he would do anything for his dream.

Even it meant being kicked out of his house by his parents who wanted him to take over the family business.

Wooyoung showed his persistence by getting his own place with some money he had saved up.

Maybe his parents were angered and humiliated by his independence because they decided to cut him a deal.

They'd pay for his expenses, both the house and college, but only if he stopped hanging out with his misfit friends who were apparently a “bad influence” on him.

They seemed to think it was a good deal, offering him an easy way out of his troubles.

But Wooyoung didn't think twice before giving up on that “easy way” out. He'd much rather be with his friends, even if it meant he had to take up a part time job on top of going to school.

He was content with his decision, he really was.

But sometimes, it did get hard to deal with.

His days melded into each other, an endless juggle between work, school and friends.

Most days he forgot about his normal human needs, often staying up late to finish assignments after a long day at work.

Sometimes, he'd ignore the hunger pangs that relentlessly attacked during the dark hours of night.

Wooyoung thought he was pretty good at keeping his troubles quiet, making sure none of his friends ever caught wind of what he was going through because of his decision to stay with them.

But in those dark times, one person would always come to check on him.

There was never a day that went by that Hongjoong forgot to keep an eye on him.

Every day, without fail, Hongjoong would remind the boy to eat and sleep and on the days where he fell asleep at his desk, he'd often wake up in his bed with no memory of how he got there.

Sometimes, he'd leave his room to get a glass of water, only to find that Hongjoong was standing at his front door, bearing food and hugs.

Wooyoung appreciated everything Hongjoong did and these days he'd always regret that he never got to tell him that.

Hongjoong would always support him in his dream, despite Wooyoung's indifference to the “utopia” he always talked about.

Wooyoung didn't believe in it and Hongjoong never forced him to.

But maybe he had been wrong.

Whatever the case, ever since Hongjoong’s disappearance, Wooyoung's dream had changed.

He was only going to think about one thing now.

And that was Hongjoong's utopia. 


	5. Yunho's Dream

_ “I've found it, Yunho.” _

_ Yunho smiled softly as he responded to the boy absentmindedly. _

_ “What have you found, Hongjoong Hyung?” _

_ “My treasure, Yunho. I've finally found it.” _

_ This time Yunho glanced up, his smile widening at the grin that had settled on Hongjoong's face. _

_ “Have you now? What is this treasure anyways?” _

_ “It's you. All of you. You guys are my treasure.”  _

_ <>\<>\<>\<>\<>\<>\<>\<>\<>\<> _

_ “You always talk about how special we are Hyung. What's so special about us?” Yunho asked one day, as he fell upon the sofa in his Hyung’s house. _

_ He was feeling especially exhausted that day. His boss was giving him trouble for falling asleep on the job and he was pretty sure he was failing all his classes. _

_ He knew Hongjoong was having his fair share of trouble too, yet the boy miraculously kept the carefree smile on his face. _

_ “You all have a secret talent, Yunho.” _

_ “Ugh, what talent? If we're so talented why are our lives like this?” _

_ “Well, not talent, more like a trait.” _

_ “Well, what is it?” _

_ “It's hope, Yunho. Maybe our lives aren't the best, but it's the way we give each other hope that makes us special. As long as we have each other, we'll make it one day. One day we'll find our utopia.” _

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Utopia.

It was all Hongjoong talked about.

He really believed he would find it one day.

Yunho didn't believe in such a thing but he would always humor the boy whenever he talked about it.

Over time, Hongjoong managed to finally convince Yunho that it was possible.

Hongjoong was truly the glue that kept their entire group together. He managed to bring everyone out of their bad times and unite them under a single dream.

He was the light that brought them together.

That is, before he went missing.

Yunho often thought the world was against them, but he knew once Hongjoong disappeared that it absolutely despised them.

Why else would it take the one person that gave them hope away from them?

Perhaps the universe had thought they would give up on their dream, their treasure, their utopia.

But no. Yunho, for one, would never lose sight of his dream.

Though he often wondered how he would be able to do it without Hongjoong.

It started with Hongjoong, but it was also Yunho’s dream now.

But without his brother, there was no meaning to the dream.

His mind came back to reality, as he ran aimlessly to God knows where. All he knew was that he was going to find him. And his utopia.

As he ran, a single thought echoed in his mind.

_ What am I supposed to do if you disappear? _


	6. San's Determination

If San tried to count on his fingers how many things were better with Hongjoong around, he would need at least ten more hands.

For one, his parents' constant nagging was definitely more bearable with Hongjoong around.

Frowning slightly as he stared out the window of the moving car, San realized it wasn't so much that things were better.

Hongjoong just helped them all fight through their struggles.

He often told them that struggles were a part of life, so there was no avoiding them.

“It's not the load that matters.” He would say. “It's how you carry it.”

He'd teach them how to brave through the hurdles and never lose sight of themselves.

So even though San was being forced to become a businessman, he and Yunho always practiced dancing in their free time.

Even if he felt hopeless at times, it was going to be ok as long as Wooyoung was there to offer hugs.

Even when he felt confused at times, Yeosang was always there to give him advice.

And even if they were being torn apart by problems, Hongjoong was always there to pull them back together.

At least, that's what San had once thought.

When Hongjoong disappeared, they all drifted apart and their lives went back to the way they were before he came into their lives.

Staring out the window, San watched silently as a young man ran aimlessly along the sidewalk.

He was running with a purpose and San was slightly irritated, jealous and impressed at the same time.

San wanted to run with that much determination.

He wanted to run and run and run until he found the one thing his Hyung had spent years searching for.

San was sick of what his life had been reduced to since his disappearance.

His eyes narrowed, a determined expression settling on his face.

The moving car stopped for a moment.

Without a second thought, San tore open the door, jumped out of the car, and ran.

He was going to find it.

He was going to find utopia.


	7. Seonghwa's Mission

Seonghwa thought dreams were very intriguing.

The way they could literally be anything under the sun. A goal, a place, a person, a voice.

The way they caused a person to fixate on them, as if nothing else in the world existed.

The way they made people forget about reality.

The way they made people feel things they had never felt before.

Hope, confidence, peace.

Oblivion.

Dreams were very strange, he thought.

Because just as they made everyone believe in their existence, they'd disappear just as fast, making the person crash back down into reality.

Seonghwa had had a dream once.

Along with seven others who shared the same dream.

He didn't remember the dream, nor did he remember the names of the others.

He only knew that these things existed.

But they all vanished without a trace.

It had started with one.

The disappearance of their leader.

Everything went downhill from there.

It had been so long that Seonghwa couldn't remember anything about that time.

Sometimes he wondered if any of that had even existed.

It had felt so real at the time, but as if he was dreaming within a dream, it all faded away.

All he could remember was a single voice.

A feminine voice. Telling him to open his eyes. To find him. 

And a scent. A calming scent that smelled like home and comfort.

And that was it.

No name or address to be found.

Wind rushed past his ears, ruffling his hair slightly as he finally opened his eyes.

It couldn't have been the first time he'd done so, but the feeling was incredibly foreign.

Just like how he knew he had to have seen parks not unlike the very one he was currently standing in before, but something about it felt different.

Seonghwa was completely lost and confused.

He knew the only way to stop that feeling was to do as he was told.

Glancing down at the bracelet sitting in his palm, Seonghwa allowed himself a small smile.

It was time to find the owner of that bracelet.


	8. Hongjoong's Utopia

Hongjoong didn't do much that day.

In fact, he wasn't doing much these days in general.

Yet, he couldn't explain the incredible exhaustion that weighed down on him on a daily basis.

He knew he had become complacent.

He knew he had stopped caring.

But could anyone really blame him?

One night was all it had taken for him to lose everything he cared about.

A night that happened so long ago, he doubted he remembered everything correctly.

Shaking his head, he sighed, knowing deep down that he would never forget the way his friends' lives slowly began to fall apart as he watched on, helplessly.

The way they would look to _him_ for guidance, not knowing how powerless he really was.

Sometimes, he would dream about them.

All of his friends.

He dreamt of a confident Seonghwa, a successful Mingi, a content Yunho.

He dreamt of a world where they all had everything, where everything was perfect.

He dreamt of utopia. Very often.

Sometimes he'd get confused when he woke up, believing for a moment that his dreams had been reality.

Those days were the hardest to get through.

When he woke up to a calm peaceful feeling, only to remember how incredibly alone he was.

How he had no idea where his friends were anymore.

How he had failed them, over and over again.

But still, underneath all the helplessness, something bothered him. A feeling he shouldn't be allowed to feel.

Hope.

It was a lie, he knew it. There was no hope for him at this point, he was never going to find his friends again.

But the voice in his head continuously nagged, giving him false hope.

Telling him that somewhere out there, the utopia of his dreams _did_ exist.

He just had to find it somehow.

The hope flickered a little, making Hongjoong realize that even if it did exist it definitely wasn't in this corrupt and broken world.

In his mind's eye, a shape began to emerge as he had the thought.

It was blurry at first but eventually Hongjoong was able to make out a man standing before him.

A man dressed all in black, a mask covering his face and a hat over his head.

His imposing eyes stared thoughtfully into Hongjoong's own, freezing him to the spot.

They stood like that for a few seconds before the man with the black fedora finally spoke.

“There are countless dimensions in the world.” He said simply, as if expecting Hongjoong to understand.

And he did once he opened his eyes.

Emerging from the dream, Hongjoong's eyes immediately landed on the hourglass next to him.

It was his first time seeing it and as he stared in slight awe and confusion, the sand in the hourglass began to flow back from bottom to top.

And he understood what he was meant to do.

He was going to find it.

His utopia.

The man’s words echoed in his mind once more.

_It's not the reality that makes you lose your dream. It is your decision._

And Hongjoong's decision was made.

He wouldn't lose his dream this time.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  


Here's the official entry![I Dream Of Utopia ](http://ateez.kqent.com/bbs/board.php?bo_table=gevent&wr_id=4251&sfl=wr_subject&stx=I+Dream+Of+Utopia&sop=and)

**Author's Note:**

> Well that's that! It's open to interpretation since a lot of events weren't explained. There are, of course, reasons for the events but it wouldn't be fun if I told yall everything, now would it?👀🤣😅 It's my first time writing open ended stuff and I enjoyed it a lot! Plz go check out my entry on the official website and maybe drop a like? Thx for reading!💕


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